9.-This-garbage-can-scene.

My Friend Dumped Me

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Welcome to Ask The Nerds. Have a burning question? Go ahead and email us and we will do our best to answer it for you! We always keep our questions anonymous so you have no worries!

 

Hi nerds,

I have noticed a lot of in-fighting in the nerdy girl world lately and it really bothers me. One of my friends recently turned on me to hang out with the “cooler” kids here in LA and it really hurts! Is there anything I can do to get my friend back or is she gone to the darkside for good?

 

9.-This-garbage-can-scene.

Beloved Abandoned Nerd Friend,

Fighting is only cool if it involves otherworldly weapons and accompanying background music. Since most fights don’t involve these things, the reality is that fighting is the absolute worst. This is especially true when it involves one of the rare people we call a friend. Your pain over being abandoned by this friend is completely warranted, and I’m giving you the biggest cyber-hug right now because no one should ever be traded in like that. I can’t guarantee that there is anything that you can do to get your friend back other than be your usual awesome, nerdy self and hope that she realizes that the “cool” kids really aren’t that cool (because they seldom are), and comes running back desperate for some sort of nerd movie marathon or gaming session. This is completely possible. When I was in this situation, all that came of it for me was I watched the girl who I had memorized Harry Potter spells with turn into someone I didn’t like at all. However, I realized something important when this happened: she was not a good friend.

I can’t predict whether your friend will or will not come back, but I would like you to consider a couple of things.

1) Do you really want a friend who would abandon you for other people like this? It is completely possible to hang out with more than one group of people. If she was a good friend, the kind you want in your life, she would never have dropped you at the prospect of being with other people. She would have kept you in her life and been friends with them AND you. The fact that she dropped you for these kids is an insult to you, and no one deserves to be insulted like that.

2) Do you realize how great of a friend you are, and don’t you want a friend who will reciprocate that back to you? Seriously, look at you right now. This friend went off and left you for another group of friends, and all you are concerned about is having her back by your side. You’re not being angry or venomous about it. You just want your friend back, and that says a lot about how much you care for her. You obviously care about this girl a ton, and guess what? You deserve a friend who cares about you, too!

3) Friendship isn’t just about finding someone you hate less than other people or share a few interests with. Friendship is a mutual relationship between two people who enjoy each other’s company and care about one another. Friendship is a team. It’s a partnership. You want someone who will stand by your side and fight, not someone who is going to switch sides on the battlefield because the other guys have better costumes! Can you imagine if in the middle of everything Tony Stark just stopped and said, “But, look at Loki! He’s FABULOUS!” and switched sides?! The Marvel universe would IMPLODE.

So, maybe she will come back. Maybe she won’t. To me, it sounds like you lost someone who was always going to get lost eventually, and I cannot stress the fact that you deserve better than that enough. There are plenty of other nerd girls out there, and I’m sure there are some who will treat you better and never make you question if another group of people is more worthy of attention than you are. Find those girls, befriend those girls, eat nachos with those girls, and get yo nerd on with those girls, okay?

Ps. You’re wonderful, and your “friend’s” poor decisions are not at all a reflection of you or your self-worth. You’ve got it together, and she’s still searching for herself. That’s all this means. Keep being awesome. Greater things will come your way.

Sincerely,

Daliya Risik

@TasteTheChaos


 

Hello fellow nerd,

Friends don’t always agree on everything or have the same goals. That’s OK, as long as you’re still there for each other equally and have compatible priorities. If that’s not the case and one person is giving a lot more than the other to preserve the friendship, then it’s not ok. Unfortunately, people tend to value different things, and that’s why friends grow apart. But this may actually be positive since you don’t need someone in your life who values superficial connections more than real significant relationships. It’s always hard when things end, and it’s certainly normal to want to try and get your friend back with some inspired act of awesomeness, but you’re only going to end up hurt and resentful, and, most likely, wasting your time.

As you get older, you’ll realize that you only have a certain amount of time and energy to put into relationships, so you’ll want to make sure you’re only putting significant effort into people who make you happy, not the ones who bring you down. People grow apart. It’s part of life. At some point, your friend might catch up with you and you’ll both be on the same page. But if that doesn’t happen, it’s ok too. You will have other friends who won’t put a Hollywood douchebag first, because they know what truly matters.

And the same thing goes for nerd girl on nerd girl fighting. Remember to always be direct and sincere. Don’t believe all of the gossip. Be objective. When someone is talking shit, and you don’t agree with them, say it. Stand up for your friends, but don’t get caught up in high school like drama; that needs to stay between other people (i.e., people who are not you). However, if somehow it does manage to include you, don’t talk shit, confront the person directly, and make sure you politely tell them you don’t want any trouble and you’re available if they ever want to chat. There’s already so much real drama going on in this world that we need to stop attacking each other over petty matters. Actual cool kids aren’t dicks. They’re inclusive, giving, loyal, and treat other nerds how they want to be treated.

 

Hugs and tacos,
@evildorina

GenderBias

“I’m not a female filmmaker, I’m a filmmaker”: Breaking through the celluloid ceiling

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I always kind of knew that being a woman in the film industry would be tough, but I never realized how tough it would be. I mean, it wasn’t until 2010 that a woman, Kathryn Bigelow, won an Oscar for best director. For god’s sake, they even played “I am Woman.” Patronizing much? What about “I am Director?”

In 2008, when I went to grad school for film at USC, which is the best film school in the world according to The Hollywood Reporter, only 13 of the 50 incoming filmmakers, were women. It wasn’t until 2010 when USC finally made a point of admitting 50% women, calling themselves “forward-thinking” and patting themselves on the back. What is this, 1950??

When I said I wanted to go into directing, my graduate advisor even told me “maybe pick something else, there’s not many women in directing. Try editing instead, women do that.” Being stubborn, I disregarded his advice and pursued my path and won the Harold Lloyd award for directing twice, and became the only woman selected to direct a major film in my year with a $12k grant and Academy-Award winning mentors.

Even after film school, when I became a television producer, I would regularly be told in executive meetings that they “wanted a woman at the table” but that I “shouldn’t speak to the clients, we just need a female presence.”  The boy’s club of executives would often criticize me for being too “aggressive” and “bossy” compared to other male producers.

Well screw that! I made sure that every executive meeting, I piped up and made my ideas heard, and it worked. I was able to create and produce my own primetime show, City Walk, before the age of 30, I created and directed a web series called Best Friends Book Club to encourage literacy in teenaged girls, I worked with Martin Sheen, Comedian Dane Cook, Adam Devine of Workaholics, Kevin Nealon of Weeds, Adam Carolla of The Adam Carolla Show, and many other talented actors.

I’ve also directed several films, including a documentary about third-wave feminism and pole dancing called Polar Opposites – despite the fact that a male colleague told me “no man will ever want to watch a film about just women” and another male filmmaker publically posted “I’ve got a pole they can climb” on our webpage. The joke’s on them, because after the film’s successful festival circuit, it was bought and broadcast by the Documentary Channel and I’m fairly certain those great ratings weren’t from women alone.

Now I’m a working director and producer, but it hasn’t been easy. I worked hard, but the very fact that we even need to have a Bechdel Test shows how far we still have to go in terms of women in the film industry.

So what can we do to promote equality in film and media?

 

o   Write better women characters

    • We don’t need any more films with Megan Fox being objectified, or damsels needing to be saved and sexy teenaged girls being pursued by a slasher. Write complex characters that have their own minds, their own lives, and their own flaws and problems. Check out Ms. Marvel who’s an amazing new superhero who not only battles supervillains, but also sexism and xenophobia towards her Muslim heritage.

o   Share your expertise

    • For years, we’ve been taught that women are all out to get each other. Surprise! We aren’t! And you can help even more by giving another woman a hand. Be a mentor, join a message board and share answers, help problem-solve. You might just get help yourself in return.
    • Get involved by supporting organizations working to change the inequality, such as Women in Film, Women’s Media Center and Women Make Movies.

o   Think equally

    • We often hear about “women’s films” and “chick flicks.” Guess what? Women are the majority of the world population, so maybe we should just call them “films.”

o   Support your fellow women

    • There are so few women in the film industry, so why not go out and celebrate how kickass they are! Nicole Perlman was the first woman to write a Marvel film and it’s amazing!

o   Neutralize your language

    • The days of “actor/actress,” “director/female director,” “cameraman” and “sound guy” are over. And it’s about time we found a new term for “Best Boy!” What about “First Assistant Grip” and “First Assistant Electric?” Language has power, and words can change minds. Many a time I’ve been on set with an amazing female “best boy” and it just s
    • Marvel is a great example of this when they announced that the new incarnation of Thor will be female and they made sure that their language reflects it: “This is not She-Thor,” senior writer Jason Aaron said in a Marvel release. “This is not Lady Thor. This is not Thorita. This is THOR. This is the THOR of the Marvel Universe. But it’s unlike any Thor we’ve ever seen before.”

GenderBias

 

 

IndustryInequality

 

 

*Infographics courtesy of the New York Film Academy*

 

Caitlin Starowicz is an award-winning writer, director, and producer for film and television. She has been recognized by Women in Film and Television, DocUtah, the LA Times, Buzzfeed, Women Make Movies and The Documentary Channel. She can be reached through her website at www.caitlinstarowicz.com and is always willing to help a fellow filmmaker.

 

 

American Horror Story — Halloween parts 1&2

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This two-part episode packed in a lot of information, while somehow raising more questions than it answered. Look out for AHS Murder House spoilers ahead.

First, it’s time to celebrate, because I was actually right about something! One of my (many) speculations about Tate is true–he is Constance’s son! That small tidbit was overshadowed by the questions about him brought up in this Halloween two-parter. For example, in one of the scenes he was wearing the rubber suit. Does that mean he is always the guy in the rubber suit? I’m hoping not, because gross. There’s a weird discrepancy with him. He seems to understand the minutiae of the Murder House, and appears to be able to manipulate some of it to his will (as in the episode in which he scared Violet’s bully). But then we are introduced to the dead high-schoolers who claim to have been murdered by him, and he unravels into genuine bafflement. It’s difficult to reconcile these two parts of Tate. More importantly, is he one of the many walking dead on the show? (I’m guessing probably yes).

I was absolutely shocked by Addie’s death in this episode. Addie was mowed down by a car whilst trick-or-treating, in such a casual way it almost seemed an afterthought. I wonder if it will ever be revealed how the dead function in the show. Will Addie be able to come back because Constance pulled her to the Harmons’ lawn? If she can come back, it seems like it could be difficult to keep this secret from Tate.

Hayden returned in this episode. I find her storyline tired, but I did like her better as a vengeful spirit, and the scenes between her and Vivien were powerful and needed. Vivien is really starting to get on my nerves. I’m glad that she finally had the guts to kick Ben out, but SHE was the one who wanted to leave that house, and with good reason, so why was HE the one who left? Wasn’t that a good opportunity to get her and Violet out of there? Why do the characters in AHS have that typical horror-themed lack of good judgement?

Wild speculation time. Because I can’t take any normal people for granted, I’m going to say that there’s something off about the security guy who Vivien is becoming attached to. I fully expect everyone to die by the end of this season, but I still have my fingers crossed that Violet will make it out.

Addie and the dismembered baby delivered to the original house owners bring the House Death Toll to 16.

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Comic Review: 24 Underground #5

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This is it, folks. The thrilling conclusion of 24 Underground is finally upon us. There’s a lot of action in this one including a big showdown in the end between the Russians, Jack Bauer, and the CIA. Will Jack escape both groups that are after him? Considering how Live Another Day starts, you can kinda take a guess, but it’s still some edge-of-your-seat excitement right up until the last page. My only complaint was that the ending wasn’t totally satisfying for me but that’s probably just me not wanting to let go. This miniseries did a great job of filling in the gap between seasons of the show, and was a lot of fun to both read and write about. I’m going to miss having Jack Bauer in my life, but I know it’s time to move on to other obsessions (like the new season of Doctor Who that is starting. Are you with me?) I hope you’ve enjoyed this series as much as I have. Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!

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Comic Review: The Star Wars

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Comic Review: The Star Wars by Rinzler, Mayhew, et. al

Review by Prof. Jenn

——–

So this is a comic trade that is based off of George Lucas’ original-original rough draft of the screenplay for The Star Wars. That is, Star Wars before it got edited for quality and way before it got re-purposed for less quality and more busy unnecessary additions.

What.

I have my opinions, more as a literature expert than an old-school Star Wars nerd, though I must confess I am equally both. It’s important that Han shot first, but I can actually explain to you literarily why. The scene at the Millennium Falcon added in w/Jabba? Completely unnecessary. But I’ve got the literary chops to explain why, beyond my nerd rage.

Now, it seems that several geek-culture favorites these days tend to fall into the trap of the fan-service. The fan-service is the thing that happens in the story of a new episode of a thing that does nothing for the actual plot except show a thing that will make fans squee. See: the entire movie Phantom Menace. See also: the ending of Doctor Who episode “Deep Breath.” (We can talk about this later if you like.)

This comic story is based on Star Wars before it was Star Wars: we’ve got snippets of images of all three of the older movies (Tatooine, betrayed youg’uns, snippets of Yavin and the Wookiees very similar to the Ewok uprising in RotJ, a Leia and, well, Annikin romance but he’s really the Luke character in this story), some themes and dreary plot points from the newer movies (politics, trade embargoes, wily and lying politicians, overly ornate headgear for the Princess/Queen), and all the art smacks of the concept art all us Star Wars nerds know and love from the pen of Ralph McQuarrie. The oddly androgynous C-3PO, the Luke Starkiller with the buzzcut mullet, the green-skinned amphibious Han Solo, and the oddly bug-eyed Chewbacca all come from McQuarrie’s starwarsrinzlerillustrations we all know and love.

Thing is, when you read this, you can really appreciate the changes made to Episodes 4-6. You really can. You can appreciate the available charm of its characters, its streamlined Hero’s Journey of an action-based plot, and its iconic tropes buffered to a new sheen. The story of this comic is tired, too complex, too wordy in ways no one speaks (okay well all the movies are like this too) and, well, basically, nothing really…happens.

What this is is fan service: for those of us who were obsessed with this epic series and who wanted more from the prequels, those of us who appreciated the streamlined storytelling before Lucas got the tech and was allowed to add in extraneous whatever-he-wanted, this is a window into the writing process and indeed the creative process itself.

It’s interesting.

It’s not a great comic.

Bottom line: I don’t recommend this to anyone but the most completionist collector or the most die-hard Star Wars fan. It’s a dreary, plodding, clunkily-drawn peek into an early draft of a movie series we’re glad got edited from it. It’s fun to see McQuarrie’s creations in a sort of action, though.

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Comic Review: Thomas Alsop #3

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boom_thomas_alsop_003The past is finally meeting the present in the Thomas Alsop comic, and now is when it starts getting interesting. With a deeper connection to his family’s past, I’m finally seeing the potential in Thomas and the lengths he might have to go to in order to set things right.

Starting off the comic this month, we got an admission from Thomas about how he doesn’t feel as deep a connection to the island as his ancestors did. We’ve seen it hinted at, but I’m glad that he finally came out and said the words. In fact, he’s been sliding on his family’s history for all his current success, digging into family journals to find old ghosts and make good entertainment for his media image. But he can’t just keep going like he has been. Thomas has a destiny, and he’s got to make sure he lives up to it by reconnecting with the island. His solution on how to go about that, though, doesn’t quite instill a feeling of mental stability.

Thomas’ solution for reconnection is to risk death by overdose. If he can get close to dying, then he can feel the connection better and maybe uncover why there’s been a constant darkness over it for all these years. Whether it’s a hallucination or reality, Thomas’ mind-trip does provide us with more clues and better visual connections between the past and present. He has a waking dream of drowning, thrust back to 1702 where he overhears the situation with Neziah Bliss and the implication that the boat he’s so afraid of is indeed cursed. Thomas knows this to be true, as he gets a clear image of the wood’s power when he touches it. Virgins drained the blood of good men to feed the forest, grow the wood, build the boat. Then the blood from the virgin daughters of the priests of The Black Ring was used to etch in spells to the wood, which was all used to keep Tunde under control. He is the dark force that brought death and destruction to the island, and continues to do so to this day.

The whole situation with Tunde is interesting, especially the yet-to-be-seen extent of his powers. We know he is said to be able to raise the dead, and The Black Ring wants to learn everything he can do, wants him to teach them his tricks. I have a feeling he’s going to be killing a few of them before willingly giving over his secrets, but I can believe that his overwhelming darkness has stained the island for all these years and continues to do so.

The implication that the 1992 burial of “The Box of Lost Things” with the sealed spell inside is connected to the tragedy on September 11th was a bit too thin to follow, though Thomas believes it has a strong connection to Tunde’s situation. We leave the issue with him ranting to the EMTs and his friend Marcus Rogers that he has to save all the 9/11 victims. How he’s going to do this is yet to be seen. Personally, I’d like to see the connection spelled out in more concrete terms, but for now I’m willing to wait.

Rating: 3/5 Stars

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Comic Review – Star Trek: New Visions “Times Echo”

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ST New Visions

I gotta say, I was a little thrown off at first by the style of this book. Having not read the previous issue of this series, I didn’t know what to expect. Once I got past that though, the story itself sucked me in pretty quickly. I also immediately recognized the fact that while I might not love the photojournalistic style of this book, other people would probably love it since it does make you feel like you’re watching an episode of TOS appear on the pages.

You can even hear the voices of the characters come to life in your head with each bit of dialogue. It also helps that the story is pretty solid and enjoyable to read. Overall I was pleasantly surprised with how this one played out, and would recommend it to the real Trekkies out there who would like a fresh taste of the old series.

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Book Review: Jackrabbit

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Book review: Jackrabbit by Ian Healy

Review by Prof. Jenn

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Ian Healy has delivered again in this next installment of superhero novels in the Just Cause universe. As I have written before, I have and continue to enjoy Healy’s ability to embody the coming-of-age voice, as well as the voice of the “regular Joe,” whether they are superpowered or not. (Sorry, “parahuman” is the correct term in his universe.) In Jackrabbit, though, we run into a new kind of parahuman–that of the Herald. The cheeky rabbit god and his buddy the frog god run into a new, insectile god in God’s Land–and it is revealed that this new god isn’t one invented by humans. This is a big deal, and not a good thing, at all. So (as it so often is) it’s up to our trickster god Leporidus to save the day. He begins his rescue plan by choosing a Herald–that is, a human who will embody the god on Earth. He selects hapless nerdy teenager Jay and, as it turns out, he has made an excellent choice.

Since I know Ian personally (we grew up together through Talented and Gifted programs in junior and senior high school as well as the theatre programs in said schools), I can slap him a virtual yet hearty high five in glorifying the nerd in this world. Even with today’s “geek chic,” nerds are still the victims of bullying today, and actually the nasty insect takeover of Earth event in this novel is connected directly to the theme of bullying. What Healy does very well is illustrate real human beings, whether it’s the coming of age type of Jay/Jackrabbit here or Mustang Sally in his earlier works, or “normal” folks trying to deal with the extraordinary, as in yet other novels in the Just Cause universe. And I love that the female hero is adorably annoying–it’s so great that she’s not flawless, but we still love her. Thanks for the realism and the joy amid the tense action. Also, thank Heaven for an African-American protagonist hero.

Usually I adore Healy’s Just Cause books without question, but I had a couple minor reservations about this one: a) why does Jay have to get all buff and huge when he transforms? Isn’t he a better Rabbit god herald by staying slight and quick? b) Bunny, Jay’s best friend, smacks of the stereotypical Gay Best Friend. In fact, he reminds me of the gay dancer friend in the 1984 movie Breakin’. maybe it’s the dance studio thing. Anyway… c) Jay turns real cheeky once he becomes Jackrabbit. he was pretty meek before. I’m not quite buying his snarky transformation. Maybe if he were already getting in trouble because of his wit and cheek, before he transformed? That way we can see exactly why Leporidus chose him, and his personality later would fit, etc. d) I hate to say it, as I love the ending, but I think it was a little too easily achieved. All of you, go out and read it and come back and tell me what you think.

Bottom Line: Jackrabbit is a fantastic novel and I recommend it wholeheartedly.

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Sailor Moon vs. Sailor Moon Crystal

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It’s the fight we’ve all been waiting for. Even though a few years ago we didn’t even know we wanted it.

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Sailor Moon vs. Sailor Moon Crystal

Reactions to the new Sailor Moon series have varied wildly, ranging from excited to horrified after Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon Crystal began airing worldwide on July 5th. As the third episode was released on the second of August, and we have another week to wait for the fourth, it seems like an appropriate time to analyze the two series in a completely professional and unbiased manner.

Manga Faithfulness

Though the original series added some lovable elements to the Sailor Moon franchise, it’s no secret that the majority of the anime was ridiculous filler. The primary motivation for the remake is to make a series more faithful to the manga’s source material. I’ll miss getting to know the villains better, but filler was taken to a criminal level in the original, stalling character development and plot. The first three episodes of Crystal each correspond to the first three manga chapters, in which we meet Sailor Moon, Mercury, and Mars respectively. To compare, Sailor Mercury isn’t introduced until the eighth episode of the original. That’s an extreme delay to plot, even if the manga is a bit too fast-paced at times. The obvious winner of this round is…

Sailor Moon Crystal!

Transformation Sequence

Sailor Moon’s transformation sequence is iconic, and it’s important for it to be perfect because we have to watch it so many times. There’s no better way to compare the transformation sequences is than watch them. I’m not a fan of the new CGI transformation. Why are her limbs so… noodly? Toei Animation also managed to make it longer. I don’t know how anyone could have watched the original and thought, “Well, we clearly need to see the main character spin in circles for more time before we get to the action”–even if they did cut it down in episode three to allow the other girls some air time. The winner of the Transformation Sequence Award has to go to…

Sailor Moon (the original series)

Music

Related to the transformation sequence is the importance of music. I don’t dislike the opening theme of Crystal, it’s pretty epic with decent lyrics and some whirling guitar solos. I also like the choir that accompanies the most epic moments of the show. On the other hand, coming from a girl who has the original series’ transformation sequence as her ringtone, the old show’s music was catchy as heck. Though I like the suspense the new music creates, I miss the theme songs that would get stuck in your head for days, and I think a series that is ultimately made for kids should have that sing-along quality, so this award also goes to…

Sailor Moon (the original series)

Art & Animation

Here’s where I’ve seen the most contention about the new series. I will admit, Crystal seems to have missed the mark when it comes to animation. In the very first scene you can see the frames stagger, and there have been a few times I’ve winced to myself because the face proportions were so bad. Some of those close-ups make the girls look truly inebriated. The shading is snappy, though, and it has a much more modern feel. There’s something about the lengthened, looser style that embodies the manga better (at least to me) though why they thought it was a good idea to draw the lips in is beyond me, as that always looks creepy in anime. The old series certainly feels dated in comparison, and some of the drawings in it are just plain bad, too. Whether or not it was good for its time seems irrelevant.

I have to get serious for a moment, because I feel this is where Crystal is receiving the most criticism. People aren’t happy with the quality of the animation, some refusing to watch the new series. I have to point out that maybe Sailor Moon isn’t being remade for you. By you, I mean the other 20-somethings who wanted it to be the high-budget remake that encapsulated all of their dreams while still reveling in the power of nostalgia. Sailor Moon Crystal was made for two reasons–to closer follow the story and character development presented in Naoko Takeuchi’s manga, and to bring Sailor Moon to a new audience. I want a new generation of girls and boys growing up with the feminine power of this set of magical girls. I want them to be introduced to the non-censored version of the content in Sailor Moon, and I want it to be theirs. Sometimes, a show will feel too dated to be relatable to a younger audience, but I don’t think kids will notice the animation quirks in the new anime as much.

Sailor Moon Crystal

So I’m giving this category to Crystal, which makes this competition a tie, and I think that emphasizes my points. There will always be people who prefer the quirk and fun of the original, but dismissing the remake because it isn’t perfect is unjust, and I think in the future there will be people just as loyal to the new series as they were to the old. In the meantime, we can enjoy the influx of Sailor Moon swag that will be in stores, and be content knowing that a new generation will learn that girls can be intelligent and powerful on their own.

Image credits: [1][2]

Ask the Nerds: How to Date a Non-Nerd

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Welcome to Ask The Nerds. Have a burning question? Go ahead and email us and we will do our best to answer it for you!

Hi Nerds

 
My boyfriend isn’t really into nerdy things and I don’t know how to relate to him on a free-time level. We have gone back and forth about this for a long time and he has finally started to warm up to the idea of checking some stuff out. 
 
So I have two questions:
 
1) Do you have any advice for a nerdy gal with a non-nerdy boyfriend?
 
2) Since he has started showing some interest, where do I start?!

Hi Nerd,

First of all, it’s good that he’s showing interest in what you like. That’s a sign of a good relationship. I’m assuming you’re showing interest in his stuffs, too, right?! But since you’re asking about moving things in a nerdy direction, it’s all about finding an activity that you both enjoy doing, then adding something nerdy to it. In general, I think everyone’s a nerd about something. You just have to find what he’s really passionate about.

Does he like movies? Find a local theater that plays old school movies like E.T. or Back To The Future. How about books? I’ve gotten people into comic books by having them read non-superhero stuff like Saga or Y: The Last Man. If he likes Breaking Bad, I don’t see why he wouldn’t like Preacher. On that note, I know people who generally hate fantasy stuff with dragons but still love Game of Thrones. Does he like music? Take him to a John Williams or video game music concert. What about games? Settlers of Catan and Small World sound really nerdy when you explain them to someone, but, once you play them, people get really competitive, and it becomes really fun to yell at each other about wool. There’s also video games. Everyone likes Mario Kart!

You may not be having sex to the Battlestar Galactica soundtrack right away, but you’ll probably be role-playing as Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle before you know it! (Please remember to use protection.)

Hugs and tacos,

Dorina Arellano

@evildorina


Dear Brave Nerd Girl,

I, too, lived the life of dating a non-nerd. It can be challenging at times when your man doesn’t know the laws of House Elves or the ridiculousness of Hobbits. I would suggest letting him see all of your enthusiasm for these nerd-type things, but don’t necessarily make him feel obligated to like them. Remember, even in the nerd community, not everybody likes every fandom. The important part is finding something nerdy that he finds interesting, but not demanding that he be interested by all of the things that you are. Think about what you know about him and what appeals to him, and work off of that.

My boyfriend loves the idea of power radiating from within, so Avatar: The Last Airbender was an easy sell for him. I think that you will also find that nerdy things that are also pretty funny are easier for a lot of people to swallow (example: Sokka in Avatar). You just have to be gentle. If you just start speaking elvish and demanding that he refer to his car as the Enterprise, you might frighten him.

Regarding your second question, I would start by showing him a couple of your favorite things in moderation. If it’s a show, request he try the first three episodes. If it’s a movie, just start with the first movie. Give him a taste of these things without shoving it down his throat. I would also highly suggest jumping into a new fandom together so it feels like he isn’t going the journey alone. For example, when I first started watching Supernatural and Game of Thrones, my boyfriend was wholly uninterested. I kindly suggested that he just watch the first couple of episodes with me. Now, he refers to Sam and Dean like they’re family, and I personally watched him weep over Oberyn Martell.

The important part is that your boyfriend is willing to at least give it a try. My best advice would be to experiment. Once you find something that catches his interest, he’ll be trapped. It will be a mere matter of time before he’s reading fan theories and you catch him staring blankly at a wall as he tries to process what happened in last night’s episode.

Side Note: For nerd conversion regarding games (i.e. MTG) or video games, I would highly suggest betting and or prizes of the silly and/or *eyebrow wag* other variation.

 

Best of luck in your nerd-conversion!

Daliya

@TasteTheChaos

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